Family Solutions Counseling

Guiding Lives Toward New Destinations

Contact Us Today

(405) 242-5305

  • Home
  • FSC Owners
    • Carrie Kyger
    • Joshua Nichols
    • Rebel Buersmeyer
  • Therapists
    • Rebel Buersmeyer
    • Carrie Kyger
    • Mary Scruggs
    • Joshua Nichols
    • Julie Perna
    • Nancy Soliz
    • Derek Thomason
    • Victoria James
    • Coleman Lemmons, Jr.
    • Mindy Rhoades
  • Services
    • Online Therapy (Telehealth)
    • Individual Counseling
    • Couples Counseling
    • Family Counseling
    • Child & Adolescent Counseling
    • Sexual Addiction & Compulsions
    • Intimacy & Sex Therapy
    • Drug & Alcohol
    • Eating Disorders
    • Nutrition & Weight Loss
    • Pain Mgmt/Chronic Pain
    • Infertility Issues
    • Therapy Groups at FSC
  • Blog
  • Events
  • Recovery Solutions
    • About Recovery Solutions Program
    • Sex Addiction & Trauma Assessments
    • Therapeutic Disclosure
    • Betrayal Trauma Couples Weekend
    • RECOVERY COURSES for Sex/Porn Addiction and Betrayal Trauma
    • Eating Disorder Recovery Group | by Dietitian on a Mission, LLC

WEBINAR: Internet Benefits & Pitfalls for Recovering Addicts while Social Distancing | Joshua Nichols

March 30, 2020

Quarantine Sucks! Series: Managing Life While on Lock-Down

In this FREE webinar, we will be discussing the dangers of the internet for those in recovery, but we will also be discussing how the internet can be useful, especially during a time of social distancing.  Please join in for some great information and quality discussion.  See you online!

Join Zoom Meeting
https://zoom.us/j/712332485

Meeting ID: 712 332 485

One tap mobile
+16699006833,,712332485# US (San Jose)
+13462487799,,712332485# US (Houston)

Dial by your location
+1 669 900 6833 US (San Jose)
+1 346 248 7799 US (Houston)
+1 929 205 6099 US (New York)
+1 253 215 8782 US
+1 301 715 8592 US
+1 312 626 6799 US (Chicago)
Meeting ID: 712 332 485
Find your local number: https://zoom.us/u/ab18Lzlfxo

Tagged With: boundaries, covid-19, covid-19 pandemic, covid19, CSAT, family solutions counseling, fear of relapse, internet boundaries, joshua nichols, pandemic, porn addiction, porn addiction recovery, recovery, recovery help, recovery matters, relapse, sex addiction, sex addiction recovery, sex addiction therapist, social distancing, social distancing boundaries, social isolation

Why Do Women Cheat? Inside the Mind of a 10 Year Old

October 10, 2019

My 10 year old daughter never ceases to amaze me. She informed me last week of why women cheat. Allow me to set the stage before I hit you with her unmatched wisdom. I was sitting in the pick-up line, waiting for my daughter to be dismissed from school. I know, lots of fun, right?! Anyway, to kill some time, I turn on Joshua Nichols and Erin Bellamy’s RecoveryTV segment on Why Women Cheat  (which is a great video by the way, you should really watch it). Well, about three-fourths of the way in, the car line starts moving so I stop the video, put my phone down, and pull forward to let my daughter in. A couple of minutes go by before I hear, “why women cheat… hmm. I know why women cheat…” As a mother who is also a marriage counselor specializing in betrayal trauma, I just couldn’t wait to hear her reasonings. Upon first hearing them, I thought they were kind of silly; but, then I really began thinking about them. In all honesty, they have quite a bit of merit.

So, without further ado, here are the 4 Reason Why Women Cheat from the Mouth of My 10 Year-Old

BECAUSE THEY WANT TO. Maybe women do. However, in most cases, I don’t believe that most women set out to intentionally cheat on their partners. Infidelity by women is typically emotionally driven. They may feel unappreciated or neglected by their partner; or, they may feel disconnected and lonely. When an opportunity presents itself, these empty feelings can turn into excitement and comfort as the woman is now being seen, heard, and wanted.  Often, the newness of these emotionally driven relationships result in furthered attention-seeking behaviors, validation by others, and connection that tend to fill these voids, even if for only a short period of time.

TO SCAM HIM. I’ve heard of this going in two different directions. The first being women who play on the emotions of others, “building the romance of a lifetime.” Once they have gained the affection and trust of the scammed individual, the women will slowly begin to ask and expect gifts, money, or even bank account/ credit card information.   The second is blackmail, typically in attempt to keep an affair going or to keep the affair or some knowledge of the affair partner a secret. Exposure of the affair can be threatened with several gains in mind: money, continued emotional relationship, continued sexual relationship, or career advancement just to name a few.   To my daughter’s credit, it was a clever answer. However, rarely, if ever, have I worked with a couple in my practice where the female partner was unfaithful to in effort to scam her affair partner, although I am sure it has and does happen on occasion.

THEY DON’T LIKE THE GUY THEY ARE WITH BUT DON’T WANT TO HURT HIS FEELING EITHER. Although, I’m not convinced that a typical woman just no longer likes her partner, I do believe a similar phenomenon is occurring. Have you heard the phrases, “We just aren’t in love anymore,” “I feel like we are just roommates,” or, “he no longer sees me?” A lack of love or lack of feeling loved can be a strong motivation for some women. Often, women who leave the marriage experiencing emotional longing before cheating begins. For some women, cheating is a means to transition out of a bad or affectionless marriage. For other women, cheating is a cry for help within the marriage.

TO BE MEAN TO THE GUY SHE IS WITH. Revenge sex is on the rise. Retaliation is too common of a response after finding out that a spouse has engaged in their own extramarital affairs. The desire for retribution can be intense for the injured partner. She may feel justified and even driven to hurt her partner with the intent of getting even. She is angry and may feel the need to teach the partner a lesson. To ensure the partner feels the same hurt and pain, some women will even go out of their way to make certain their partners find out.

I wrote this blog because I was amazed by the level of insight displayed by my 10 year old. I thought it would be interesting to share her answers to give the readers of glimpse into the mind of 10 year old girl when it comes to topic of betrayal trauma by females. I appreciate you reading, but I would also encourage you, once again, to watch the RecoveryTV segment on “Why Women Cheat,” as Erin and Josh outline 4 more common reasons for female unfaithfulness.

Although, these reasons only touch on why a woman might cheat, the principle of the matter is that a majority of people engage in infidelity because they are looking for something, whether it is love, affection, sex, money, connection, or revenge. Affairs are almost always the result of relational problems and/or emotional emptiness; however, affairs don’t fix marital issues, hurt, or emptiness. Instead, affairs also almost always result in feelings of violation, rejection, and mistrust. If you and your partner are experiencing conflict, lack of intimacy, disconnection, or any other issues, I would encourage you to seek a couples therapist specializing in betrayal trauma recovery. Thanks again for reading.

~Rebel Buersmeyer~
Licensed Marital & Family Therapist
Certified Sex Addiction Therapist

Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: #recoverytv, adultery, affair recovery, betrayal trauma, betrayal trauma recovery, cheating, couple recovery, couples therapy, CSAT, do women cheat, erin bellamy, Forgiveness, infidelity, joshua nichols, Rebel Buersmeyer, recovery, unfaithful, why do women cheat

Intuitive Eaters Beginners’ Workshop BEGINS | 6 weeks

May 9, 2019

CONTACT US TODAY!!

DO ANY OF THESE STATEMENTS SOUND LIKE YOU?

You use food to soothe negative feelings?

You have a hard time trusting your body to tell you when and how much to eat?

There are “forbidden foods” that you do not allow into your home?

You struggle with your relationship with food and your body?

Most of the people I work with say YES to these statements.

In our society, it is difficult NOT to think about food, body shape, and size 24/7.

We’ve practically been conditioned from birth to act and look a “certain” way — ONE SIZE ONLY!

I am so excited to share the journey of intuitive eating with you! If you are ready to try a NEW APPROACH, I invite you to sign up for my Intuitive Eating Beginners program and Find Food Freedom and Body Peace Forever.

Only by freeing yourself from chaotic patterns of dieting — under-eating and/or over-eating — can you truly achieve good health.

In this program:

  • You will discover strategies and ways to:
  • Handle emotions, thoughts or circumstances WITHOUT depending on food
  • Find satisfaction and feel good about eating
  • Recognize hunger and fullness
  • Practice self-care to help you achieve your body’s natural, healthy weight
  • Discover new tools to help you feel great in your own skin

Please contact us to learn more about Brittany Hunter‘s Intuitive Eating Program.

 

 

Tagged With: binge eating, brittany hunter, dietitian, eating disorders, food addiction, intuitive eating, recovery

RecoveryTV LIVE | Children in Recovery | Guest: Nancy Soliz, LMFT, RPT

April 26, 2019

GO TO THE EVENT

Most of us have heard of the concept of “recovery.”  However, we likely think of it as something that adults are involved in.  We generally don’t think of children going through a recovery process.  In this episode, family therapist and registered play therapist, Nancy Soliz, joins us to discuss the recovery process for children who are impacted by trauma and addiction.  We hope you will join us for this LIVE discussion.

About our Guest: NANCY SOLIZ, LMFT, RPT

Nancy is a graduate of Kansas State University with a Master’s degree in Family Studies and Human Services after receiving her Bachelor of Science from Oklahoma State University in Family Relations and Child Development.  Nancy is a Registered Play Therapist-Supervisor and co-owner of the Oklahoma Play Therapy Training Institute.  Nancy has also served as president for the Oklahoma Association for Play Therapy.  As a result of her interest in trauma and attachment issues, Nancy worked as the Director of Social Services at The Bair Foundation in Oklahoma City as well as with military families in Ft. Riley, Kansas. Nancy has completed the training for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) as well as the beginning training in Dyadic Development Psychotherapy (DDP) and Theraplay.  Nancy is currently in private practice at Family Solutions.  Nancy lives with her husband and children in Oklahoma City and enjoys her work furthering the practice of play therapy with families and children.

 

Tagged With: addiction, childhood trauma, children in recovery, counseling for children, family therapy, nancy soliz, play therapist, play therapy, recovery, registered play therapist, trauma

RecoveryTV LIVE | Using Medication in Recovery | Guest: Dr. Jennifer Morris

April 5, 2019

CLICK HERE TO GO THE EVENT

On this episode of RecoveryTV LIVE, we are interviewing Dr. Jennifer Morris, a well-known psychiatrist in our community, to discuss how medication, psychotherapy, and recovery can work together.  If you have been considering utilizing meds as part of your recovery and/or therapy, then you should tune in to this episode and bring your questions.  See you online!!

 

ABOUT OUR GUEST: JENNIFER MORRIS, MD

Dr. Morris received her M.D. from the University of Oklahoma Health Science Center in 1999.  After working the field for a few years, in 2009, she founded Edmond Psychiatric Associates, a group practice where she and her team provide state of art treatment for psychiatric outpatient care.

Dr. Morris practices general psychiatry, with special focuses on treatment resistant depression, depression associated with comorbid medical illnesses (including polycystic ovarian syndrome), attention deficit disorder, suboxone management (opiate detox), and transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS) treatment and management.

She has delivered over 70 lectures to colleagues and peers regarding medication management, treatment resistant depression, eating disorders, and attention deficit disorder.

 

Tagged With: #recoverytv, edmond psychiatric associates, family solutions counseling, Jennifer Morris, medication and recovery, medication management, mental health, psychiatrist, psychotropic medication, recovery, recoverytv live

  • 1
  • 2
  • Next Page »

FSC Upcoming Events

Aug 13
9:00 am - 12:00 pm

Friday the 13th Ethics: Online Integrity | Zoom Event | 3 CEUS

View More

Contact Us

10400 N. Vineyard Blvd., Suite A
Oklahoma City, OK 73120

Phone: (405) 242-5305
Fax: (405) 242-5345

Email: therapy@familysolutionsok.com

Location

Sign up for our Newsletter!

Get interesting news and updates delivered to your inbox. Follow the link below and sign up today!

Sign Up Now
For Email Marketing you can trust.
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Twitter

Our Policy

It is the policy of Family Solutions to treat all clients and not to discriminate with regard to race, color, religion, national origin, age, sex, sexual orientation, gender identity or expression, or disability.

Family Solutions Counseling Copyright © 2021 · Designed By Right Eye Digital · Log in